12 days of (post-)Christmas Cleaning

In the interests of making the New Year and the internet a cleaner (and thereby healthier) place the Fibbing family brings you this little ditty. I’ve written it out in its long form, because… I can. So there.

On the first day of cleaning my vacuum cleaner found – an unidentified thing.

On the second day of cleaning my vacuum cleaner found – 2 dolls’ heads, and an unidentified thing.

On the third day of cleaning my vacuum cleaner found – 3 foreign coins, 2 dolls’ heads, and an unidentified thing.

On the fourth day of cleaning my vacuum cleaner found – 4 squashed raisins, 3 foreign coins, 2 dolls’ heads, and an unidentified thing.

On the fifth day of cleaning my true love said to me, “good grief we found the floor” – 4 squashed raisins, 3 foreign coins, 2 dolls’ heads, and an unidentified thing.

On the sixth day of cleaning my vacuum cleaner found – 6 shiny sequins, “good grief we found the floor”, 4 squashed raisins, 3 foreign coins, 2 dolls’ heads, and an unidentified thing.

On the seventh day of cleaning my vacuum cleaner found – 7 dirty socks, 6 shiny sequins, “good grief we found the floor”, 4 squashed raisins, 3 foreign coins, 2 dolls’ heads, and an unidentified thing.

On the eighth day of cleaning my vacuum cleaner found – 8 plastic bags, 7 dirty socks, 6 shiny sequins, “good grief we found the floor”, 4 squashed raisins, 3 foreign coins, 2 dolls’ heads, and an unidentified thing.

On the ninth day of cleaning my vacuum cleaner found – 9 bits of wrapping, 8 plastic bags, 7 dirty socks, 6 shiny sequins, “good grief we found the floor”, 4 squashed raisins, 3 foreign coins, 2 dolls’ heads, and an unidentified thing.

On the tenth day of cleaning my vacuum cleaner found – 10 scurrying spiders, 9 bits of wrapping, 8 plastic bags, 7 dirty socks, 6 shiny sequins, “good grief we found the floor”, 4 squashed raisins, 3 foreign coins, 2 dolls’ heads, and an unidentified thing.

On the eleventh day of cleaning my vacuum cleaner found – the neighbour’s cat, 10 scurrying spiders, 9 bits of wrapping, 8 plastic bags, 7 dirty socks, 6 shiny sequins, “good grief we found the floor”, 4 squashed raisins, 3 foreign coins, 2 dolls’ heads, and an unidentified thing.

On the twelfth day of cleaning my vacuum cleaner found – loads of biscuit crumbs*, the neighbour’s cat, 10 scurrying spiders, 9 bits of wrapping, 8 plastic bags, 7 dirty socks, 6 shiny sequins, “good grief we found the floor”, 4 squashed raisins, 3 foreign coins, 2 dolls’ heads, and … an unidentified thing.

*An alternative version could read, “On the twelfth day of cleaning my vacuum cleaner found – bags of sandpit sand, the neighbour’s cat, 10 scurrying spiders, 9 bits of wrapping, 8 plastic bags, 7 dirty socks, 6 shiny sequins, “good grief we found the floor”, 4 squashed raisins, 3 foreign coins, 2 dolls’ heads, and … an unidentified thing.”

 

With particular thanks to my husband for the number 5 line, and the little Fibbers for inspiration. Sigh. Back to the grindstone.

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